struggle as a first time mom

My one and only concern during pregnancy and postpartum is that I might not produce sufficient milk to feed baby. I was fortunate as I started lactating soon after delivery. However, I didn't master the art of breastfeeding immediately and ended up with engorgement along with much frustrations. The situation was made worse with a hungry and wailing baby who was just impatient to suckle slowly. After wrestling with him at each feeding session, not only was I tired but also wounded with sore nipples and blebs. The well intentions of parents and in-laws who advocated formula feeding also sabotaged and dampened the exclusive breastfeeding plan.

To be honest, I was truly discouraged, frustrated and in pain with the blisters and engorgement. I wished baby could miraculously just fall asleep after feeding and cooperate fully when he wakes up.

Being me, I just refused to give in to 100% formula feeding straight away even when my own mother kept saying that I wasn't producing milk for feeding. Then I thought of using breast pump to alleviate the engorgement and also to let the blisters heal before I go back to nursing again.

And here's my first proud achievement to shut all critics-

After a few days of diligent frequent pumping, here's my personal best-


At least for now, there's always milk ready in the fridge ready for little hungry Ean!

While exclusive breastfeeding is always on my agenda, I wanted to be realistic and practical. Baby is breastfed 5 to 6 times in the daytime and supplemented with formula twice at night. Reasons for supplementing with formula is that the confinement lady can help with the night feeding so that I can catch up on my sleep. Besides, formula milk is more filling thus allowing baby to sleep through longer. Well, this is the survival plan which has worked well for the past 2 weeks and till the confinement lady goes away.